This is the toast I prepared for Sister and BiL [their names will look like this to protect their identities … not that most of the people reading this can’t figure it out … but it’s the thought that counts… ] And any notes I’ve added to sort of explain things will be in this font.
Hope you enjoy!
Mawwage. Mawwage is what bwings us togevvah today. [Yes, I really did this, and in the funny voice. If you don’t understand, please watch The Princess Bride.] And this is indeed a blessed arrangement. Because what are the chances of my quirky, geeky, know-it-all sister finding the perfect man for herself? A man who accepts her quirks for what they are and flavors them with his own, and no, I won’t go into those here. A man who is just as much of a geek as her: their song is Weird Al’s “The Saga Begins”, which summarizes the plot of Star Wars: Episode I, and their favorite past-time is playing WoW together. And a man who can accept her know-it-all behavior for what it is and lets her know that once in a while, he is wrong. Like at a gas station when there wasn’t enough room for her car (which he said there was) and she hit the red, cement-filled pipe that keeps people from hitting the gas pump (like she said she would).
Not only that, but finding a man who is loving, kind, a great daddy, and a wonderful support through thick and thin. And a best friend—someone she wants to spend all her time with. Sister, you’ve found all of that (and more) in BiL. And even though I’m your “baby” sister, I still look out for you and am right there in your proverbial corner. It makes me so happy to see you with a husband who is everything you need. (And can I say that it’s weird and wonderful to be able to say he’s your husband??)
The first time I heard of BiL, Sister told me about this great guy she’d talked to. She said, “He’s nice, funny, smart, and HE LOVES VIDEO GAMES and doesn’t care that I’m a girl!” You see, all the other guys who played video games didn’t want her to play because, I don’t know, they’re stuck in elementary school, where girls have cooties. I was glad to hear of a guy accepting my sister as a friend.
Sister, please remember that I love you, but I don’t remember the day we met. I know, you do, but it’s difficult to remember when I was a day old. Growing up, I remember always wanting to be just like you, and following your every example. I hope I can follow your example of finding a man who is your best friend for life like you have with BiL. And I hope I can be a wonderful, beautiful woman for a man like you are. Also, I’m a little upset that you’ve done yet another thing before me! [This sentence was very tongue-in-cheek]
BiL, I’ve considered you my brother for at least a year now. It’s nice to be legally able to say it! … You guys did remember to sign the marriage certificate, right? [And this is where BiL ragged on me for forgetting his ring during the ceremony. … I deserved the ragging, and I’m still laughing over it!] Over this past year, BiL, you really helped me through some difficult times. You were really there for me, like an older brother should be. And I know that you’re always there for Sister, not only as a lover, but as a friend. I really do think that something that will help your marriage last the hills and valleys will be your great friendship. I love the way you guys laugh over the smallest things. You have such a happy home, and it also reflects in Bugg, who laughs all the time … except when she’s hungry or tired. Like today. Thank you for allowing us to share in your joy, your laughter, and your love today.
Congratulations, Sister and BiL.
To true love. I’m glad you two have found it. As you know, true love is the greatest thing in the world, except for a nice MLT (a mutton, lettuce, and tomato sandwich, when the mutton is really lean…) To Sister and BiL! [The MLT was yet another The Princess Bride reference. Really, you should watch the movie! …No, wait. Read the book. It’s better.]