Reusing a Post

For those of you who are my friends on facebook, you’ve heard this story before. This event changed my life FOREVER, for those of you who don’t know, so I thought I’d share it here. The bonus, though, for my facebook friends is that I’ve REDONE THE PICTURES FOR IT. Ohhh, yeah.

It all began on a stormy night. A stormy night that wasn’t so stormy. Actually, I don’t remember if it was stormy or not. That’s not the point of the story. Sorry for getting hung up on unimportant details.

An important point is that I WAS ALONE IN THE HOUSE. This wasn’t unusual or really even scary for me, as this gave me a chance to be noisy in the house when I usually kept things quiet for Mom and Dad. Noisy = playing my music loudly and singing to it.

…Okay, I’ve looked through my notes on this event, and I guess it all began around 6pm. This having taken place in November, it was already dark outside. So, I guess it was night, even though it wasn’t that late. [Quit focusing on the unimportant details…] At 6, on local television at least, The Office is on. [Ooo… I ended a sentence with a preposition again.] I sat down to watch it, it being one of my favorite shows. That’s when I heard it.

A noise.

In the house.

Somewhere.

In.

The.

House.


So I sat there for a moment, didn’t hear anything else, and went back to enjoying my show.

It wasn’t long before I heard IT again.

A noise.

[We could go through this again, but I don’t feel like it.]

[Or maybe I do.]

In the house.

Somewhere.

In.

The.

HOUSE!!!

Okay, so maaaybe I wasn’t this freaked out. This is an example of exaggeration. Most of this story, though, is not exaggerated.

Then I realized I knew that sound from somewhere. It was Mei Mei barking. I should know the sound of my four-legged children’s voices. But I sometimes am not that great of a parent. And why was Mei Mei in my parents’ bathroom? Weirdo.

If only I knew…

When I entered Mom and Dad’s bathroom, the first thing I noticed was Mei Mei was by their trash can. Why, WHY did she have to become a Raider of the Trash after nine years of leaving that kind of stuff alone?? But Mei Mei wasn’t interested in what was in the trash, she was interested in the floor at the bottom of the can. And Moozka was there, helping?

Uh oh. They’re getting along.

These two never get along. Unless, of course, there’s a dying baby deer [or a fawn] dying in the field right outside my window [which is really quite horrifying to hear], or they have a common evil to vanquish. I did not hear any screaming noises, so I came to the conclusion that it was the latter. As Han Solo would say, “I have a bad feeling about this.”

Mei Mei continued to sniff all along the bathroom cabinet, into Mom and Dad’s room, and back, all the while crying. It was then I started to realize exactly how doomed I was.

Time for some back story. Mei Mei and Buddy Boy are rat terriers. They are bred to hunt and kill varmints. When they find said varmint, they make a lot of noise to alert the humans that they found said varmint.

This is exactly what Mei Mei was doing. I was alerted, all right. I knew that Mei Mei only acts like this when there is actually a raw and wriggling creature nearby. By raw, I mean live.

I joined the dog and cat in the hunt for the elusive mouse.

I didn’t see anything, so I sat in Mom and Dad’s bathroom and listened.

To this day, I wish I hadn’t.

The noise I heard was unlike anything I had ever heard before. It gave me the chills. Screeeeeeeeeeeee …. screeeeee …. screeeeeeeeeeeeeeee….

Mei Mei’s perfectly attuned satellite ears had located the sound. It was coming … from the under-the-cabinet vent that was right at my feet. Please note: I am not afraid of mice. I have had pet mice, rats, hamsters, gerbils, and guinea pigs. Rodents don’t scare me. But the sound of … THAT … was creepy! My imagination went into overdrive, and even though I knew it was just a mouse running around in the vent, according to my imagination it was this huge, evil, demon-monster-boogey man thing just waiting for me to turn my back so it could eat me or take my brain or whatever it is that those things do nowadays.


And I hadn’t even seen a scary movie in a year.

Except now it was quiet in the room. I realized then that I did not want to be in the room when the mouse actually came out because of my lovely imagination. I couldn’t shake the image of demon-Katie from Paranormal Activity. So I decided to go watch the rest of Seinfeld, since The Office had long-since ended.

I didn’t get to watch the end of Seinfeld, either.

Before I knew exactly what was going on [what happened is kinda fuzzy for me –pun intended this time {it wasn’t the first time}] I heard something in the dining room. It was Moozka. She had caught the mouse! …Only, it wasn’t a mouse. It was a shrew. For those of you who have read Redwall, Brian Jacques got the personality of shrews down correctly. They may be tiny [this one was only about 2 inches from nose to tail-tip] but they have the ferocity of … ferocious ferocities.


Luckily, the shrew was dead.

I had a few tasks in front of me. I needed to get Moozka away from the shrew, keep Mei Mei from getting the shrew as well, throw away the shrew, and – oh yeah – Moozka and Mei Mei were no longer friends and were trying to kill each other for possession of the shrew. Moozka decided the shrew needed to be moved away from Mei Mei. This was unfortunate for me in a few ways: 1) the shrew had a hole in its chest and was leaking copious amounts of blood [for a shrew] onto the floor and 2) Moozka was heading toward my room to hide her shrew from Mei Mei.


Quick, do something quick, girl. And don’t forget to breathe.

So I fixed some gooshy food for Moozka [one of Moozka’s main reasons for living] and grabbed a plastic bag with which to dispose of the shrew. With Moozka sufficiently distracted, I tried to prepare myself to pick up the dead shrew with a plastic bag. Sure, there was a plastic bag between my skin and the shrew, but in my mind it felt like I would be picking up the shrew with my bare hands. Also, there was a nagging doubt in my mind that the shrew was somehow pretending to be dead and was lying in wait to ambush me and kill me. [I thank God for not making shrews any bigger than what they are or we’d be doomed.]

Somehow, I managed to scoop the shrew into the plastic bag without really touching it [it’s difficult to explain…] and I was too eeked out because of my wonderful imagination to even tie the bags closed.


But I survived. Somehow. Luckily the shrew did not.

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One response

  1. B says:

    Lol! Haha, I remember this! XD